last day | penultimate month
The days and nights have gotten quite cold, and the memory and sensation of unusually warm autumn days just a few weeks ago is fleeting, and soon to be forgotten.
It has been a tempestuous time for me in many ways, belied by my usual equanimity or, perhaps better put, balanced by it. The thing is, this has been my norm for a while now, perhaps for the last decade or so. And the warp and woof of my days brings things to a clear point: sink, or swim. And swim I have, even though the waves and currents have at times been formidable.
One hasn't drowned yet. I look out from my hermit's cave and see the world as it is, and I'm still very much in it, though at times the sensation is that of walking through a dreamscape. I try in my own way to mitigate the hazards of falling with the usual: meditation, reading jags, memorizing sutras, walking... lots of walking. One footstep after another, even if the hills are steep, the path unclear, itinerant.
And then after so many miles, the weariness sets in and dictates rest: to sit, to sleep, to dream again all the while trusting that the messages from that liminal shore might help to make sense of it all.
To my relief, they do.
Just some lock screens lately that made me pause, remember...
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